Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
