Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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