My cat gives me a boner
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
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