her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
the room spins SO much faster in panama
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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