I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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