I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
