You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Randomize
