some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
