Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
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