white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize