fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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