If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize