It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
We are all done wearing pants today
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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