doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
