Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
