It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize
