I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
There are leaves in my underwear?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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