I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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