Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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