Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
