I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
His nipple licking is glorious
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