i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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