No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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