does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
