We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
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