hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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