How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
