May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
We don't watch enough power rangers
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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