I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
