I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
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