At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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