our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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