Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
