I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
