I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize