I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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