So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize