it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
