we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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