When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
