Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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