Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
It was confusing and full of hummus
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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