dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize