i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Damn victory sex feels great
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
