just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
