dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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