Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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