i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
