You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
