Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize