found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
